Italians Do it Better?

The beach is a hot spot when it comes to meeting guys. I guess that's why we made it our go to place in Alicante. I immediately remarked two new presences within our group one evening. One of them turned out to be housing with my friend and he was in company of his friend. Now while I appreciate all things italian there is nothing I can appreciate more than italian men. I mean who can resist a handsome sensual charming flirt. Italian men practically have a bow on their head and a gift tag around their neck on which one can read To: Women From: God. Everything about italian men is sexy and if you're looking to be really appreciated by a man you may want to consider a one way ticket to Italia so as to bask in adoration and good food (well not too much of it, no need fatten up those thunder thighs). That night was like Christmas morning, I could not wait no begin unwrapping. I was quite enjoying my prospect but with my luck my seduction skills weren't rubbing off on the right guy. To insure your understanding of this other guy's character I will elaborate. You may recall Shorty Meeks from Scary Movie 2, you know the real pothead who gets smoked by his own pot plant? Well this guy (being from northern italy so having a bit of a german drive) had the same attachment to beer as Shorty did weed and consequently their manner of speaking was scary alike. You can only imagine what being hit on by a guy like this can be like. Some guys like to take their time, others like to be smooth some even like to throw in a cheesy line but this guy was not stealth at all and had no tact. He'd be putting his hand around my waist at every occasion and then letting his hands travel were they should not be traveling. I obviously did not leap up and exclaim: "Bon voyage!" Quite the opposite as I would brush him off as politely as I could before he could cross any borders. He seemed to like that I wasn't giving in so you can imagine how this was affecting my game as his friend stood all the while in front of me. He tried relentlessly to snatch a kiss from me and it was beginning to tire me. How does one attract and repel at the same time? That was a question I thought best to leave for Habermas (a modern philosopher) to ponder. I would just have to hope another occasion would arise for me to get me some yummy italian lovin'.
They say “Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow - that is patience.” And that is exactly what I did. We crossed paths time and again but never for very long. Finally one night, we ran into him at one of my favorite clubs and he decided to stay with us after his friends left. We danced together, laughed together and enjoyed the summer's fun loving atmosphere together. As our hips moved together, I shot him a smile and he leaned in for the kiss. Finally, the long awaited moment had arrived! Satisfactory yet not the most delicious kiss yet. After the final song of the evening, we walked part way home together. We had a goodnight kiss and went our separate ways. It was the last time I saw him before I left Alicante. He was well worth the wait. Afterall, isn't there an italian proverb that says "Hard work never did anyone any harm"?

I look forward to the next time I cross an italian and think to myself: "Baciami!"